Unsocialized Homeschoolers

Here’s what happens when you take a large family of sheltered, unsocialized homeschool kids out into the real world (i.e. the dentist’s office).

When each child’s name is called by the hygienist, they jump up grinning and prance forward as if they’ve just been announced on the red carpet.

While you are having your teeth cleaned, you can hear your three-year-old in the next chair explaining to the dentist and the hygienist the roll call of who in the family sucks their thumbs and who sucks their two fingers.  They can’t understand a word she is saying, but you can.

Your four-year-old hops into the chair and cheerfully announces to her hygienist, “I am sometimes a little bit shy with people that I don’t know.”

Your six-year-old explains how all five children are currently sharing a bedroom, complete with a description of who sleeps where … and who used to sleep in which locations before they were rearranged.

Your seven-year-old is mesmerized by the super hero cartoon on the waiting room TV.  When the commercials come on, he watches a whole series in a row and the remarks, “Huh.  Those were all good ones.  Not any bad ones!” (because he doesn’t understand the distinction between ‘commercials’ and ‘reviews’ – like the Dice Tower board game reviews he watches with his Daddy on YouTube, where they far prefer to watch the bad reviews because they are funnier).

The dentist assures you that showing up pregnant to every third bi-annual appointment is actually not a cost-effective alternative to just having the dental x-rays. ;-)